typed with my thumbs...

I was home again from another blind date. I had ramped up my efforts to find a boyfriend but it all left me feeling devastated. Every lame date another pounding reminder that I wasn't going to find some nice boy to dupe into loving me. oh right. You're not supposed to make it sound like you're tricking them...
I came in furious with my face burning hot. I had sufficiently worked myself into a froth on the bus ride home... God help the next person that tried to talk to me.
I whipped my jacket across the sun porch and worked on ripping off my tie. I couldn't bear to throw it down in all it's vintage silk beauty so I rolled it up to tuck into my shirt pocket.
Anthony was working at the kitchen table and stayed quiet as I ripped around trying to find a glass.
"No point in asking you how things went is there?"
I gave up looking for my favorite wine glass and grabbed a sqat juice tumbler.being good I measured out less than a half a cup. I can just pour more when anthony goes to bed.
"I. Hate. Gay. Men.HATE THEM SO MUCH." Small sip as my other hand tried to unbutton my shirt.
"Ok, ill take the bait. What the hell happened?"
"Just another fucking tool who's more concerned over if we'd have a great combined income than if we're compatible. That & coffe shop boy orchestrated the whole blind date. What a fucking kick in the dick. I adore his personality so he sets me up with some fucking goof that spent all of dinner fantisizing about how to make more money. I have a hard-on for Noah based on the fact that he has a soul so to speak..."
Sip sip sip. Anthony didn't look too concerned, I think he was more releived that I wasn't trying to get back together with the Ex.
"I want to date someone who knows they're fucked up, but they want to work on it. Not just chucking meds down their throat or comsuming things to fill the void." I looked down at the mostly empty glass with the vapours of wine still wafting up.
"It's no big deal. The sooner I come to grips with operating as single for the rest of my lifen the sooner I can stop torturing myself." I stared forward and had a mix of lost and resigned plastered over my face.
"This is the part where you say fuck it and say you're going to jerkoff and go to bed..."
"Yeah you're right." I slipped out of the kitchen & made my way upstairs. What a horrible waste of time when I might as well stayed home to slink off to bed alone.