Saturday, July 25, 2009

"one part for you and one part for me"

here i am, quite the fool. as soon as i talk about you out loud i roll my eyes. bright blue-tinted balls rolling back faster than a shark in a feeding frenzy. i make myself bored listening to the story of the Start and The Reason i feel this way towards you... sick and bored and tired. assinine condemnations that i save for idiot associates and their sad stories. i miss something i didn't have and i miss my sanity.

the time spent thinking is thudding around in my empty conscience and there's that guilt of never lavishing this affection on the ones who wanted it.

there's not that frantic chest clenching angst now, but the reaction is burned into my muscle memory. the crescendo of tightness clamping down on my chest and i smile. i smile and it's a real joy but... but what? what now? move it, keep pushing, try to ignore my lack of sincere irreverance to get over it.

you're still milling around in my empty room of crushes after i've dismissed everyone else. i'd invite you to stay, but what will i feed you? what can i offer that isn't glutenus junk that'd rot a hole in your gut. tacky treats of ill-thought out feelings and nothing of real substance. nothing that'd fill you up the way you deserve. nothing that would keep you coming back so you could avoid the gut rot.

just keep hanging out a bit longer in the side of my vision... you're fodder for a sputtering creative drive. you're kind enough to keep yourself entertained flipping through my scrap book of stories and ignore the snippets of you that slip out to the floor. no mind, i keep them at the back of the book to keep them out of sight... but easy to turn to and envelop myself in your pieces.

you - by das pop

You, you break my heart
You tear me up, in so many parts
One part for you and one for me
That is how it ought to be
You, you know my sins
You know that i will do them again
I do one for you and one for me
That is how it ought to be
You struck me
That is why i'm standin' here
You struck me
You are everything i fear
You struck me
Since you're gone our home has changed
You struck me
I just wanna get out of here
You, you break my heart
You tear me up, in so many parts
One part for you and one for me
That is how it ought to be
You struck me
You struck me
You struck me
You struck me
You, you break my heart
Oh you oh you
Yeah you
You break my heart
Oh you oh you
You break my heart
You tear me up in so many parts
One part for you and one for me
And that is how it ought to be