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An email comes to me over lunch... a friend has gotten a new job within the company he currently works for... Foolishly he sends out an en mass email during lunch... meaning we're all dicking around and waiting to pounce on an email... Censored/name changes to protect the not-so-innocent


Hello Urrrrrrbody,

I'm in a new position here at Manulife and with it comes a new email address and phone number. So, do NOT email [censored] because I will not get it and that address should be terminated shortly. So the new address is [censored]. For you [insurance folk] when you punch my name into Lotus Notes make sure it comes up as [censored]. They can't seem to get my middle initial right. I also now have a direct line, [censored] so call me on there for anything. Enjoy the rest of the week.


Thank You,
[Buuuurd]

Nice an innocuous, right? Then the Reply-To-All responses come in....

With this new title and responsibility, can i expect payment of your debts or do i need to send Tater down there with the promise of cheeseburgers to break your legs?

[Ginger Kid]

Hee hee... so clearly this is going to go badly... more so because i had to just throw one in...


You’re too late, he bought off Tater’s loyalty with the promise of all expenses paid 8 minutes of glory in the Dollhouse Champagne room.... holla at yo’ DogHouse hos!

→ ~j. ←

Back history: the Dollhouse is a rather unsavoury strip club in town. It’s also known as The Dog House and “I’m not fucking going there, can’t we go to Roxxanne’s?” And Tater loves him some Dollhouse action...

j., you know me well, I love the DH!!!!

Thanks for the reminder Ginger Kid, Burrd also owes me $20!!! YES SIR HE DOES!!!

But I can be bought as j. suggested.... :)

ha ha... ok this should end right about here... burrd has clearly been away at lunch and came back to a screen full of emails cutting him up so he manages to get a word in about Tater coming to break his legs.

You should know he prefers liver and onions.
and he can't fit into the champagne room. poor old mitts. I tried I tried.

And finally, i have to ruin it for everyone:

It’s easy math... they can have the teeth out and tassels spinning in 2 minutes and that leaves you a solid 6 minutes to have aunt marg’s cottage cheese thighs getting a work out.

Frig i made myself throw up a little... that’s enough from me.

The lesson here is: Never send out an en mass email to your office pleb. friends!!