fractal fiction - yeah i know i haven't updated in a while

sniffing and sighing I tried to catch my breath. The teeth-gritting cold wreaked havoc on my already fragile sinuses... prompting me to suck in wheezy breaths and exhale static noises of congestion and smokers cough. I rubbed at my nose with mittens i found on the streetcar and pulled my hand back thinking of the unimaginable things the mitts could have touched before I retained ownership of them. The wool caused tremours of irritation in my nose and sure enough i sneezed. Dry, brittle plate tectonics of old blood and congestion unhinged in my nostrils and i moaned at no one other than myself. I swore I'd kill myself if I did another winter in this province. You know, real winter with the snow flakes and ice that i tepidly walked on imagining my hip dislocating at every wrong step.... But here i am, bundled up in the cold and looking around at all the fucking majestic snow falling.
Germs be damned I ground a mitt into my nose to try and itch at it. Ahh... that feels better.
Now where's my cab?
I gave up on the bus system in the 20 minutes i had been back in town and instead called for a cab to come get me. My knapsack felt heavy and made me look like a student lost in a pocket up uptown businesses. I was irritated at how emotional i could get when i was cold and unfed. Guess I'm not waifish orphan material.
A fuzzy glow turned around the corner. Bliss, the cab was coming. Now hopefully it would reach me before some asshole jumped out to scam it.
I hopped into the cab and sighed happily as one last puff of cold air exhaled out of me. The cab had the cool stale smell of cigarette smoke and it made my fingers curl thinking about having one.
"Hey hey, you don't mind smell, no?"
"No it's okay by me. Have another one, I don't care."
"You smoke too?"
"You give me one?"
"Okay. Okay. You and me buddy, we smoke."
He chucked me back some cigarette that probably came from a reserve, but I wasn't picky.
We haggled briefly over the route for him to take me home and he settled back into the plush Grand Marquis driver seat. I like a silent cab ride, especially when it's the CBC on the radio. He turned it up to counteract the roar of his window being rolled down and I smiled at the new Hayden cd being played.
Smoke lolled out of my mouth and I began to warm up under the many layers of gear I had on. My eyes were puffy from holding in my feelings on the bus. No need to terrify your seat buddy by being the fat gay guy sobbing for a robust 60 minutes. That's just a courtesy.
The cigarette was incredibly strong and gave me a little head rush. Ah, that'll take my mind off things... As long as I don't faint when I try and stand up I'll be ok. i'll bank on my blood pressure being stable enough to keep me going, if only for the few feet to the front door.
"Where and When" played on the radio and I could bearly keep myself stitched together. I wiped my mouth and tried to open my eyes up wide... let the air in to dab the wet and make it evaporate faster. Gulp down the knot in my throat and push aside all my temper tantrum thoughts of I want, I need, I don't know why I can't have you... Keep it all packed up, locked up, out of sight so there's nothing to worry about. Throw it on the floor when I get home with my knap sack and never think about it again until I hit the road to see you again.