fiction - aug 19 2006

"Tomorrow never fucking comes, does it?!"
Ben and I were shaking the shit out of someone who was falling behind on our easy-to-follow payment schedule.
"It's not that hard! Pay us and we stop beating the shit out of you!"
The pleading and then trying to scream for help when we loosen up a little. Like anyone comes to the rescue anymore.
"Shh... shhh... SHUT UP. Shhh... Are we cool? Are we going to yell again?"
Ben had him in a one-hander choke, and I was petting his hair watching his eyes push out from the skin seams of his sockets. it's a facinating thing really.
"Piggy! I need you to shut up and listen. OK?"
He nodded and tears burst out from the sides. Probably more from the lack of oxygen than remorse. Ben was squeezing the shit out of this guys neck, but what's the point in telling him to ease off? What? Like we want to avoid hurting him?
"Phhlll... phhllleee...."
"Ready to talk?"
Wide eyes pooling with tears and filling up with terror. Yes yes I'll talk.
Ben loosened his hand and drew it away slowly... One deep breath in.
"Aagghghhhhh! help meeeee!" Only it came out in a strangled pile of noise. Nothing that actually was auidable beyond a 5 foot radius... But that's besides the point. I'm not mad. I'm disappointed in you, Piggy. Really disappointed.
Ben snapped him up again and charged him into the brick wall.
"Piggy! You motherfucker! Why aren't you doing this the nice way?"
Bang bang thump! Piggy wasn't doing so hot.
"Ben, hold him." I started rifling through Piggy's pockets. Bill clip. Empty. Wallet? $180 dollars? What the hell.. He had no intentions on paying us back at this meeting. Digging around some more. Hello? What's this? A fucking awesome flip head knife! Click. It came open and I admired the beautiful blade. This was the type of jabber you have to take in to get professionally sharpened. Real nice nice like. You could gut a fucking grizzly bear with this...
Piggy was really scared now.
"Were you going to show up and flay us with this shank, Piggy? 'Cause I'm pretty sure you don't go around with this sort of blade every day. Fine. Fine. I'm sick of this."
I fished around for car keys and put a hand on Ben's shoulder. Let's get back to his place and rob him. We're wasting our time."
He collapsed in a weezy little pile of wrinkled suit and coughs.
Ben called Boss Lady and brought her up to speed. He grunted a few times and hung up.
"What's the news?"
"Go back to his place and take as much as we can and then if he doesn't call the police we're all even-steven."
"Even-Steven?"
"That's what mom said."
"Pfft. Hardly worth the trouble. You better have some good shit at the house Piggy!"
His hand was wavering up. No? No? No... No? No, oh lord! he's trying to pull out another knife from his sock. You've got to be kidding me. He was dizzy and couldn't even stand up without leaning on the wall.
"Gabby, my hand's tired... Come on. You always get to be the one who screams and I choke.."
"Alright you big suck."
This knife was definately less intimidatingly cool... but with jagged edges... this thing would rip the shit out of things if they were weilded properly. Sadly Piggy was in no shape to be any threat.
"Drop it OK? You loose. You owed money from being a degenerate gambling fuck and we're calling it in. Your fault. So let's put down Mr. Stabby Stabby and call it a day eh?"
He made a sad wobbly lunge but I caught hold of his hand and yanked the knife out. Please. This is just sad.
"Give Piggy the Drywaller."
"Oh that's been done before."
"Come on! Drywaller!!"
"Wha? The what?"
"I guess you deserve to know what it is before I do this. See, drywalling contractors have a rather dangerous job you know? Everyone just thinks they prop up sheets of wall and that's it. Let me tell you, that actual drywall shit is sharp as all hell and it can really do some damage. Not to mention all the tools you need to cut it down to size. I got the idea watching someone at work and then, ya know, have a little accident. The guy sliced along his hand. Right along the side where your pinkie is, right in the middle. He cut it down to the bone and ka-pwing! it snapps all these muscles. the doctors can sometimes get up in your arm and look for them, but most of the time they're gone for good like some elastic you launch into the air."
"Huh?"
I twisted his arm roughly to flash the side of his hand towards my face. in my free hand i whisked the blade through Piggy's hand with a swift gesture. Sometimes I like to think of the muscles fraying and pulling away from each other. Snap and then all that blood... the hand instantly curls on the one side and it'll probably stay that way for a long time. I dropped the kinfe beside him. He wasn't even making a noise. Rolling on the ground stunned and clutching at blood and the open flap that won't stop until someone puts stitches in.
"Piggy, my advice is to take this $10 and cab it to the hospital. Here buddy, I'll even leave you your Health Card so it's nice and easy."
Ben and I left to go look for the car.
"He drives a Saab."
"Oh gross! You take it I'll take your car up to the house."
"Hey, Gabs, wipe up or you're fucked if a cop pulls you over."
"Gotcha. See you in 10."