february wtf did you come from?

so i'm all moved in uptown... it feels really good. i mean, it's still all so fucking new and different but i'm glad i made the change. definately have a lot less space to live in, but i had too much shit anyway. speaking of which, i had an embarassing ammount of stuff built up from taking on pretty much 3 moves and never really sorting anything just moving boxes with me. yipes, there was a lot of shit. like, i'm banned from clothing beyond cool sweaters. i had duplicates of duplicates. oy gott! guess it's part and parcel of my lunacy. so yeah, no more clothes that's for damn sure because i just don't have the f'ing space for it!
the new roommate is going on vaccation in a mere few weeks. at this point i'm getting a friend to move in and cover some of the rent. of course i'm on tentative watch right now expecting it to fall through. but that's the nature of the game, i just rarely think that things will work out.
even now, two paragraphs up i talked about being hopeful and just assume the bottom'll fall out and i'll be in a bitch. in talking about this with someone i really can't recall being super happy/content. it's like i've always been an eeyore dragging my ass around with a perpetual rain cloud. while i experience things that are happy, it's never really like UP UP UP happy and certainly not something that lasts... not mania cycles tho. i'm either bleh or occasionally receede into super meh. is that medically sound?
anyway, just pounding out a few thoughts since i'm woefully negligent with this blog.
wish list:
- to eat more salads
- to really get into the groove of being uptown and embrace the change
- start up a hardcore gay porno company & write hardcore scenes at coffee shops with my headphones on "...and that's when the orgy started" would be on a notepad all the time to copy & paste into scripts

tight.